Problem

I JUST FOUND OUT YOU'RE ALL A PIECE OF SHIT OBSESSED OVER MY DAD FOR NO REASON JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE JEALOUS OF WHAT I HAVE AND MY MOM IS NOT TECHNICALLY ALL EUROPEAN.

Problem

So, what, are these annoying whiny insults coming from Ginny Kopf talking to my parents or is it someone else?

Dreams

It's hard to remember my 1st dream.  Oh, yes, I thought my old choir director, Mrs. Campo, was murdered.  It was my fault, somehow, I guess because I'm indian.  So, I found her, and she was carrying me quite a lot with my hurt ankle.  It was interesting how I connected.  Before, Ellen DeGeneres was carrying me with my hurt ankle and I was thinking about being rubbed.  There was another dream where I was trying to **********.  My dad's youngest sister and little girl cousin, the aunt told me to be more comfortable in the bathroom.  When I went in the bathtub, I looked from behind the curtains and the light was on and she had come in then left.  The next dream, I was on a long long walking bridge, strong, like a dream.  I remember there were 3 boys, 1 maybe his name started with a Z.  1 was Tim Burton's son.  I talked to him, and he was really nice and cute.  He was small with dark hair.  I was with several adults.  I know Helena Bonham Carter was there, and she was taller than me by several inches and more rotund and healthy.  I got up thinking I wanted to put how her round, chubby daughter squaked as she picked her up.  After awhile, I said she was the most European person here and went up to her and maybe or probably started to put my arm around her.  I guess she was putting her arm around me and stuff for a long time, with my hurt ankle, which isn't really hurt now, and in different ways.  For some reason, I was thinking of old movies like Singing in the Rain or An American in Paris, which I thought of seeing Mary Poppins yesterday.  Eventually, she picked me up because of my ankle, for a long time.  I made a strong connection with her dad being all English and then with the rest of her race being Spanish and Jewish.  I'm not sure what was most memorable.  I guess my hurt ankle and seeing her as most European.  I did see maybe an all English blonde with slick hair, and I guess for some reason it didn't matter to me.  ***  So, I guess you can imagine how it was.  I don't remember all the details.  I guess I felt kinda knocked out a bit but nothing really bad, like I went in and wasn't afraid to process things.  Before, I think I felt a bit worn and unable to experience.  This time, I was kinda not fully developed, still.  When I was looking to see if she was murdered, it was very depressing and something I had to accept.  I was worried that it had to do with me not stopping it and causing it.  It was sorta a dark, trashy, more sharp slum area, more orangey and like with slits of other things.  The bridge was big, like an old dream, and weighted down, quite a lot, though it didn't seem to affect me as much as it could, like I was dead in a way partly.  It was a thick bridge.  We were sitting on the side.  There were like maybe 3 wires and a window with cement on the outside.  It was very strong, like a building or street, very thick, seemed so stable but uh-oh not really invincible.  So, Helena Bonham Carter was wearing a dress, which was maybe was like brownish with certain colors like orange or blue or green.  So, Helena Bonham Carter was saying "David" because her dad is all English a few times.  Also, I went in the bathroom to lock the door.  I can't even close my garage door because of a chord in the way.  I guess with the choir director we were down in a low area that was kinda yellowy-orangey-maybe gray.  I had told someone about a Cathedral that seemed good but not the best, you know 1 of 3.

Family Sides

I just realized my dad's side of the family has always acted like they hate me for their side, maybe because his sisters are younger, and my mom doesn't like try to make me unsuccessful because of it.

Back

I watched Mary Poppins and am back but tired and dirty.  I had a jumbo hot dog for $7, but it's not like a long hot dog.  I also had a triple fudge brownie which tasted like candy and even like a nut, like chocolate sorta cool, light tan nut, for $3.50.

So, I got up and came back at the end of "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" (didn't have to look up the spelling.)  I had to go to the bathroom.  Then, I think I left again to change my female thing.  I had already come in late from eating.  I tripped and almost broke or did something like stretched my ankle on the dark, thin stairs, to the last row.  I was pretty fine.  I had to limp but not always.  I went back to the bathroom and changed my female thing with my mom, who didn't want to go back though we had to sit down.  The 2nd time I came back they were doing "It's a Jolly Holiday With Mary," apparently an ending.  The 2nd time we got back had another coincidence.  There was maybe some coincidence.  I know once I moved and I knew what the man, a fat man, was gonna say, and I think he knew I'd knew ... I mean I moved just like the word he was about to say and it seemed I made the move before he did.  It sounded the same.  So, I walked well back.  Then, we left after the bows quickly.  I saw a girl wearing hot pink and black stripes and tripped on my other ankle from a curb, which I've often hit, especially at church.  It hurt a little, but I was fine walking on both legs.  However, I accidentally hit another curb and had to start limping.  I came home and fell asleep.  My ankle started to hurt so much.  Now I have to hop on 1 foot.

I had a creepy dream.  There was 1 where I was hanging around trying to get in maybe Ballet I and Voice.  Finally, I saw Ellen DeGeneres, and she was tall and put, vaguely, her arm around me.  She looked like me, her chest.  I wasn't having fun hopping, so she picked me up and I kept piling higher and I later realized maybe she was kissing my foot.  I had another creepy dream but forget.

I thought of going to the ER, but I really don't think they'd do anything to me.  If anyone knows, let me know.  It feels like it won't go dead forever.  I mean, yea, I might get tired waiting at the hospital.  They might give me medidince but shouldn't be too bad, though it may affect me adversely enough, as it has.  It seems it will take a few days or week.  I guess I will just hop around.  I have a cane from home.  It might be too much money to get crutches.  I guess not, but I'm not sure where my dad'd get them.  I wanted a wheelchair, but it seems crutches work.  My ankle is stiff.  Too bad they don't come to your house.  I guess they'd want an X-Ray, though I don't think I broke a bone.  Anyone have any idea of what's going on?

Problem

If you see my dad, he's not always mean.  I guess he does his damage and then just keeps sucking up.  He thinks you have to be this and that to be approved racially, like be really careful.  He also doesn't want you to be comfortable and is antsy about when you feel in private.

ANNOYED

I had my dad's chord mouse for like a month.  He just didn't get me a mouse again before..  He was gonna let me use his gym bag.  Now, it seems he gave me his alarm clock.  There are other useless, insulting messages attached.  I just don't have the sexual interest in him like that.  I don't think he's good enough for me in that way.

Problem

I'm feeling stressed with my ear hurting, but I guess eventually this pain will also go away.  The n word thing made my life so uncomfortable....  Before, I wasn't getting the right food, didn't like being around my parents.  :|

Problem

I left my Debrox open.. it was leaning over and I thought the top was on!  It was stuck in a crevice I noticed.  It made a loud noise, and my ear has a pimple, can itch, feels like stingy, and is plugged.  I may have to go to the doctor.  It feels like this ear, my left ear, is getting bigger.  I felt normal, before, though.  It just feels more plugged now.  I used the better earplugs when I took my bath.

So, I guess I'll just have a nap or no nap and sleep at school.  My mom said to use the gym, myself.  I mean, I can sleep on the bench and probably will wake up by myself.  I need a louder alarm, too.

I had a funny feeling about why my ear plugged up.  It feels like I can only hear through 1 ear!  Too bad about the pimple, but right away I change my ear plugs each day.

I have to cook my fish, pack the crackers and veggies, pack the money, hm no paper and pen..  Also, my dad didn't get me a recording device.  =[  I also don't have money for it.  I have my camera, but it won't stay on that long, I know.  D;  I mean, no, I'm not gonna listen to the class alone.  I was gonna use it if I needed it.  It's hard to think with my ear plugged, too.  My wounds are getting better but still sting.  I'm feeling more put together with something to look forward to and a nice teacher..  In the summer, not sure if she's teaching, probably, but I want to do tennis, and organ..

Problem

No, I don't know anyone other than my little girl cousin, who is a conundrum, who is from certain areas of Florida with parents from up north.

Why am I drawing in my dad just to pleasure others, things that have nothing to do with me.  Why do people think I'm just fragile and immobile?  I know I was kinda like that at 1 point growing, but this is ridiculous.  I'd have gotten over this.  What, so I get no treat?

Problem

You know, no one nice agrees with my dad turning on me.  I mean, I wasn't good to start off with.

Something Cute

So, before, my dad got Italian leaves in a box, and now it's Baby Spring Mix.  =]

I also thought of naming my son Jim after "gym" for tennis or something about sports.

Health

I found that I know that girls with fat dads have to do certain things to keep going.  My dad said he was solid muscle, but I guess when I was born he wasn't.  He came out of the marines, but so did a lot of dads.

Problem

Track my dad.  He was acting annoying thinking my daughter was a nigger because of "mistakes" I made by accident that may have been good.

Also, I get reactions on how things load from people I like that are annoying.

Food

So, for lunch, I have stuff like fish, thick red sausage if my dad got it, lettuce and cucumbers, tangerines, and I don't remember what else.  I guess I was depending on the fish.

My wounds are healing quickly.

Ellen DeGeneres and Tim Burton should learn to relax.  I'm gonna take a bath, soon.  I wanna make a new blog.  3)

Back

I returned the webcam and got $24 back.  I got an ice cream bar.

My dad was supposed to get me a lunch back but didn't.

Parents's Ages

Why am I feeling tacky for having a dad that's not extremely young compared to his daughter's age?

Problem

Someone *beep* Ellen DeGeneres.  She's blocking me on Facebook and Twitter.  She gets a stream of comments.  I didn't do anything wrong.  She's just a guilty person.  She's teamed up with my dad to annoy me when I stay backed away from him.

Problem

*BEEP* my dad won't leave me alone and people won't stop alluding to him.  You think you're so cool thinking about all the problems and "addressing" them in action.

I only have the music station on my TV and I'm getting all these messages.  IT'S HAPPENED SINCE THE N WORD THING.  I JUST PUNCHED MY DESK AGAIN.  YOU'RE NOT LISTENING.  PEOPLE ARE TREATING ME BADLY BUT MAKING ME FEEL LIKE SAYING NIGGER.  THAT IS SO *BEEP*  STOP NOT TALKING TO ME LIKE A EUROPEAN.

Something Odd

I wonder why Florida has become so stupid ... assuming the school did this, themselves ... Orlando is stupid.  They think they're flauncy.  They literally hurt you and look at you evilly like it's ***y.  I think they don't realize there will be a reason to regret doing this, all the time.  Word has gotten around that people do this sometimes, by mistake.

I don't know if I'd go to that class, but I'd probably sign up and see if I make it.  I want to wait and take it at the college, maybe, but I assumed the students were mostly pretty young.

So, why should we have a silly rule so we can't sign up for classes?  You have to answer.  I know it was so that people will miss signing up.  I was gonna sign up before the holidays, forgot to check again before.  I just don't have a perfect life, though I'm always at home or taking a walk or something and buying the healthier fast food.  So, why do they want us to miss signing up?  I guess I have to see if I still have to take these requirements.  I didn't need them, before.  I couldn't even sign up for prep math.  I don't even know what the requirements say.  It's a chart.  I still feel pressured by the school to take a class.

I left McDonald's today, and for some reason this black girl was mean to me, as it closed.  She seemed giddy on the inside like she was in on something but perhaps upset she was working.

Also, I noticed that people here are retarded and think I'm retarded and not the schools.  Hm, so, I did activities.  Um, yea.  It's the school's responsibility to prepare us for college, something they always rubbed in.  I guess they were kinda underhanded in the New Orleans area, as well.  I didn't get in Gifted and I found it a goof-off class, in some ways.  Me not being in Talented Theater my 1st year ruined everything, and me not doing Talented Music my 1st year the teacher left and I found I didn't have a foundation.  Art was good, but I found I couldn't paint.

Why has Orlando become so stupid?  Ever since I came home from college, it's been this way.  I mean, I came here for a little while before college and in between.  I don't remember much.  Hm, now I do.  Oh, well.

I think people here do care if the school did it like because of my dad or something.  It's not a joke.  My grades are my business and not my fault.  The environment is not conducive.  I know the people in the schools are racist.  They think it's their responsibility.  I don't see how postponing signing up for classes helps.  I know it was a big thing.